Random Tumblr Themes

Miranda. 21. Musician. Borderline Personality Disorder. Trichotillomania. Procrastinator. Cat lover. Bisexual. Supernatural. Doctor Who. Marvel. Don't be afraid to have a chat :)

humansofnewyork:

“I was doing time for armed robbery when I found out that my daughter had been killed. Her and my son-in-law had been doing hallucinogens, and he was choking her because that is supposed to make a better orgasm, but he cut off her air too long and ended up killing her. Instead of calling the police, he sat on her body for three days then dumped it behind a 7-11. I was so angry when they called and told me, I pulled up a footlocker that was bolted to the ground. I’m skinny but I’m strong as hell. My wife couldn’t take it, and she OD’d. They found her in the bathroom with one hundred empty bags of heroin. She’d fallen in the bathtub and hit her head on the soap dish. When they called and told me that, I tried to hang myself with my bedsheets.”

humansofnewyork:

“I was doing time for armed robbery when I found out that my daughter had been killed. Her and my son-in-law had been doing hallucinogens, and he was choking her because that is supposed to make a better orgasm, but he cut off her air too long and ended up killing her. Instead of calling the police, he sat on her body for three days then dumped it behind a 7-11. I was so angry when they called and told me, I pulled up a footlocker that was bolted to the ground. I’m skinny but I’m strong as hell. My wife couldn’t take it, and she OD’d. They found her in the bathroom with one hundred empty bags of heroin. She’d fallen in the bathtub and hit her head on the soap dish. When they called and told me that, I tried to hang myself with my bedsheets.”

greetings:

Robert Downey Jr is my fave

bagmilk:

*concerned white parent voice* sweetie don’t write on yourself you can get ink poisoning

elysedc:

The ultimate dad joke compilation

skeletism:

salt-and-pepper-skeleton:

free them

prisoners of the skeleton war

skeletism:

salt-and-pepper-skeleton:

free them

prisoners of the skeleton war

eatyourpie:

ldwt:

Grandmas Rock. A Photographic Series by Jay Hynes

I have seen my future.

h0odrich:

this looks like a man just got switched into a cats body and he’s having some self realization of the situation and he’s buggin

thecarvingwitch:

prokopetz:

sixsaltysweets:

I’M DEAD

Fun fact: if you know your feline body language, you’ll notice that the lynx is deferring to the housecat. As far as these two are concerned, the housecat is the higher-ranking cat.

OH MY GOSH

thecarvingwitch:

prokopetz:

sixsaltysweets:

I’M DEAD

Fun fact: if you know your feline body language, you’ll notice that the lynx is deferring to the housecat. As far as these two are concerned, the housecat is the higher-ranking cat.

OH MY GOSH

closettherapist:

trillgamesh:

firefoxshawty:

andrusi:

weeaboobs:

senpaitheking:

That’s not cool Tumblr and you know it, you’re basically forcing people to agree to this bullcrap. 

of course they’re forcing you to agree. if you’re gonna use their services then you have to abide by their rules.

yeah, that’s why it’s called “terms of service”

because they will let you use their service if you agree to their terms

What is the point in forcing you to agree if there is only one option that is so stupid it’s like a presidential election with 1 candidate a complete farce to be honest

Are you guys just not familiar with how websites in general tend to work

"I would like to buy a hamburger."

"Ok, that costs $1."

"I don’t want to pay that."

"Then you can’t have a hamburger."

"Why are you forcing me to agree to this? You’re only giving me one option!"

thehomosexuallyfrustrated:

vivavoxveritas:

The Fosters, finally a show that confirms boys have crushes even when they’re 12.  Let me rephrase:  especially when they’re 12.

Just adorable

phil0kalia:

If someone points at your black clothes and asks you whose funeral is it, a look around the room and a casual “haven’t decided yet” is always a good response.

bullied:

isn’t it weird that you can have friends but also have no friends at the same time

cesperanza:

prtypooper:

hahahaha this is amazing. 
Captain Small Ass and Falcon Big Butt in all their glory.

LOLOL.  I’m waiting for the photoshop in 5….4….3….

cesperanza:

prtypooper:

hahahaha this is amazing. 

Captain Small Ass and Falcon Big Butt in all their glory.

LOLOL.  I’m waiting for the photoshop in 5….4….3….